I got engaged 3 years ago

I got engaged 3 years ago on March 16. I can see that guy who just proposed on Myrtle Point on Mt. Leconte — he's excited but also out of breath: 3,000 feet of elevation gain to pop the question (that's a pretty good metaphor for dating). \

Here's what I'd say to him:

Hey younger Sam, you did it!

You not only asked a girl on a date, you asked her to marry you! You've come so far from the 6th-grader who couldn't talk to girls, the 8th-grader who could only ask a girl out via text, the 12th-grader who was "too cool" to dance with his prom date (idiot), the college boy who's only standard for dating was "completely wrong for you in every respect," and the young adult who had a hiking picture on a dating app. Look at you!

And she said yes! This is proof of God, my man. It's just like those pictures of little babies on the billboards.

Let me offer a few words:

Feelings. They're wonderful. They're like a toddler: so much fun, they make Christmas better, and you love them dearly (most of the time). But they're also like toddlers in that if you let them drive the car, you're going to have a rough time.

A day is coming when those warm fuzzies didn't wake up with you, and your spouse has decided she needs to get 14.5 projects done today, and guess what? She says she can handle it, and you can quietly read a book with a cup of coffee.

You're not. You're going to end up helping with those projects, bud. Maybe your wife hates getting on the ladder, she found a hornet's nest in the shed, or the car's axle hit the road when she drove to Home Depot for the 3rd time.

Be nice to her. You're annoying, too. We could write her a letter about being patient with you when you're screaming obscenities at the mobile banking website because YOU can't remember your password.

Either way, those feelings are now gone. But they come back. And then they'll go, and they'll come back, and they'll go. And then you'll have kids, and your feelings will be both reborn and murdered at the same time.

Feelings of love are adorable and sweet. But choosing to love someone who annoys you is better.

Also, sometimes, the most therapeutic thing you can give is time away from each other. If I'd said this year one, I might have gotten in trouble because my wife is a quality time person, as in, there's never enough time together for them to feel it was of any quality, so we'll just watch another season of Love Is Blind. Then you can have alone time. Now, she is somehow already out the door before I say she can take some time to herself. Actually, that's not true. I'm out the door, and she's watching Love is Blind by herself. She's texting me about how much she hates Irina.

I wasn't talking about alone time for you. I'm telling you to give it away to her: Tell her to go get a cup of coffee and take a book, to go for a walk, take a long shower, go out with the girls and dance to K-pop at a Korean steakhouse, whatever it is that fills her up, surprise her with it.

Lastly: "Natural family planning" is planning to have a family. Do with that what you will.

Congrats, bud!